It with humility I submit this blog post - this is where the blogging meets the road, why I held back for so long from the blogging world - what gives 'blog' its sinister leer. But then, what's to be afraid of - they're only feelings. I'll remain curt at least - the past week or so, as I have indicated here and there, has been a struggle, one that has waxed and waned according to some power beyond me. I've had some great moments (often detailed here), and then some not so great moments (generally pushed through, sometimes dwelt in, often heaped upon CHW). And it is true as many of you have suggested to me personally that those moments are the most pregnant. So here are a few gems - hardly won and easily lost as they often are:
1) It is the moments when I say enough - no more, than I am given (and I hesitate to use consider the actor behind that verb) the what I need. Is this me? Is this the world? I mentioned before - it was at the youth hostel in Meknes, the granaries in Meknes, my travel buddy in ... Meknes - OK so maybe that was a big day for me. But it stands, as it stood before, and I catalogue it here - it seems life is always just around the corner.
2) It is in other moments when if I had a white flag I would wave it that I often dive in head first - consequences be damned - or disregarded. Sometimes the gumption I need is on the farside of hope. Giving up can mean going for it.
3) Trucking around solo style has meant fending for myself socially, as well as every other way possible. I've been in countries where very few people speak English and I have come to value conversations a great deal. While the people I meet, like Eddie at the hotel bar last night, cannot provide the safety between words of familiar folks back home, the can provide the words themselves and that has gone a long way.
4) I personally would poorly tolerate the complaints of someone who is on voluntary holiday to exotic locales. While I have certainly encountered my steep gradients, I am also well supported and able to waltz out of here on a whim. As many, many of you well know, the highest hills afford the best views.
I'm at a hotel resort type thing full of retired European couples. I'm staying in Port El Kataouni for another few days, though I'm planning to move to a cheaper domicile tomorrow. I'm taking it easy before Egypt. Tomorrow I'm going to learn to scuba. Neat!
Thanks all for the love and snugglies from so far away. I set out on this trip with the myopic goal of challenging myself. On that count and dozens of others - success. Love to you!
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