"He said I was unequipped to meet life because I had no sense of humor."

Friday, September 28, 2012

A Crucible

Every fall I teach a unit centered around The Crucible.  The assignment I give my students is to draw connections among the witch-hunts of the 1690s, the red scare of the 1950s and then to an issue of their choosing for today.  The students are charged to find three parallels among these three time periods.  Their working thesis is that a culture of fear creates strikingly similar social situations, and that some parties exploited that culture of fear for their own gain.  That these witch hunters begin by targeting social outsiders, and rely on the common persons' tendency to want to fit in - to conform - to support their purge.  Ultimately, the common person is cowed into conformity (and consequently hypocrisy), because they fear for what they stand to lose if they challenge what over time becomes the new status quo.  These situations call for heros - for uncommonly brave individuals to stand against this tide.

One of our examples is Ed Murrow's crusade against Joe McCarthy in the film 'Good Night & Good Luck' - well worth watching and extremely applicable to this topic.  What has been driven into me over these past few weeks are the words of Arthur Miller and Ed Murrow among others, as they have spoken out against the terrorizing McCarthy.  Their words have been echoing in me.  Particularly Murrow's sentiment that 'No one can terrorize a whole nation unless we are all his accomplices.'  Many of Murrow's contemporaries, including his boss, believed that McCarthy would self-destruct, and encouraged Murrow to spare himself from being 'subjected to the attentions of the junior senator from Wisconsin.'  What prompted Murrow to make his stand against McCarthy and the red scare he hid behind?  For that matter what gave Arthur Miller strength to refuse to 'name names,' placing his promising career in jeopardy?  Perhaps most bafflingly, why do individual children, in the face of their peers and sometimes their superiors, stand against violent bullies when their likely reward is more of the same?

One of the most common examples used in my students' papers is homophobia - a social pressure they feel themselves.  This unit has come to mind for me again and again as I follow the conversations about the church's most recent pathological pursuit of sexual conformity.  I am employed in an institution that is compelled to support this pathology.  The place itself is dear to my heart, as all of you know, and the people who work there are some of my closest friends and allies.

While the mainstream is coming about to accept the differences among its people (yet again), the church and its institutions remain in the grip of fear and paranoia.  These institutions will still require some brave people to stand against them, at great risk to themselves and possibly the people around them.  I cannot claim to be one of those exceptionally brave individuals; while I attended an event at O'Gara's and am writing this, you will notice that I have carefully avoided using certain words that would betray me to someone looking for dissent with a Google search.  I have struggled, pathetically at times, with the tension between the draw of safety and job security within the folds of a hypocritical church - the church deeply and secretly divided on this topic - and the desire to maintain my integrity as a person; to stand outside, exposed to scrutiny and bright light.

The lasting effects of the delay I exercise, along with my struggling colleagues, is shame.  We have been put in the position where it is impossible to be ourselves and remain in communion with our church - we are personally divided, and nothing holds us back but ourselves and our fear.  It is the same paralyzing shame experienced throughout our history, used to suppress dissent and to control.  Coming from the church, this should be no surprise.

The results of the witch hunts and red scare seem to have been a bewildered population waking from a stupor, the careers and lives of those targeted detritus around their feet.  So far the desire to be among the walking stunned has outweighed the desire to be among the martyrs of history.  But I am paying for that safety with little parts of myself, and so are many of us who are compelled to silence.  Thanks for reading.